A Great Dad

Dear Kaya,

Though I didn’t know your dad well, I still wanted to tell you a story about him that originated from one of the first times your mom and I worked together at the clinic. It was a slow day, and as we sat in what we called the “doc box,” I took the opportunity to learn a little about your mom since she was relatively new  to the clinic and it was one of the first times we had worked together.

“Tell me about your family.” I said. 

“My husband Craig in an avalanche forecaster and I have an infant daughter named Kaya,” she responded. 

“Who takes care of your daughter when you are working?” I asked. Having raised two children of my own, I was well aware of the challenges of childcare when one is in medicine. Evening hours. Weekends. 

Your mom replied, “Craig watches her a lot. He is a GREAT dad.” 

The Karma must have been strong between your mom and dad, as he called just as she finished stating the words “he is a great dad.” When your mom hung up, she offered, “That was Craig. He’s driving to Denver today with Kaya. He wants to show her off to his friends.”

“Oh,” I responded.  “Who else is with him and Kaya?” I was remembering car trips when my kids were infants like you were at the time. Diaper bags. Formula. And that portion of any extended trip spent dealing with a crying infant in a rear facing car seat in the back of the vehicle. I had never attempted a long car trip when my kids were little unless I had at least one other person in the car. And two extras were even better.

Your mother’s face beamed with pride. “He’s alone. He really LOVES his daughter.”

I could only mutter “Wow!” in response. A few seconds later, I added, “He is MUCH braver than I was.”

It was time to see patients again, but my minds eye kept picturing you and your dad barreling across Wyoming. Though I loved hearing your mom’s description of your dad and you, I remained both concerned and in awe.

An hour or so later while back in the cubicles during another lull, your mother received another phone call.

After telling your dad to drive safely, she hung up and turned to me. With an ear to ear grin, she reported, “Guess what? Craig is on his way home now. Kaya started to cry and he realized the long drive might not be such a good idea.” In my minds eye, I added a new descriptive term for your dad. He was a SMART dad.

So, in summary, I wanted you to know three things about your dad:

• That even when you were at an early age, your dad was smart, realizing that with kids, you have to be flexible and adaptable.
• That your dad was a GREAT dad. As your mom described, he was so excited to have you he wanted to show you off to all of his friends, even those far away.
• And finally, that your dad REALLY loved you. He cared for you from day one and would do all of the difficult childcare stuff. Your mom told me his face lit up every time he looked at you, and he melted when you smiled back at him.

Best,

Winnie (Dr. R. Winn, one of your mom’s partners at work)